Contrary to some beliefs (or wishes), proper self-care usually isn’t sexy. Think to make a spreadsheet or to maintain an early morning routine involving healthy cooking; imagine the hardest or the ugliest thing that you could ever realistically expect to have to do. With this in mind, it’s easy to realize that self-care cannot be something we only turn out of utter over exhaustion.
Proper and necessary self-care should be creating a life for yourself that you don’t feel the need to frequently alter significantly or escape from entirely. Even though this will inevitably involve taking stock of personal failures and disappointments, it’s the only way to truly let go and move forward. However, sometimes self-care is more closely related to getting back to plain and normal; let go of the need to keep up with the Jones’s, and accept the true need to release and recharge.
According to Amil Niazi, “The act of self-care has become yet another thing women are expected to be good at. Did you use the right filter for that ‘gram of your impeccably prepared acai bowl? Are the candles you just lit in your Snap story made from organic hand-poured soy or are they that mass-produced factory shit? And how can we stem the inevitable capitalist tide from turning something as simple as self-care into yet another thing to be bought and sold? These are all things I wrestle with as I order Dominos in sweatpants under the guise of ‘being good to myself.’”
Consumer self-care cannot be a suitable substitute for personal or genuine self-care; parent or mentor yourself as opposed to pampering yourself. Similarly, alcohol, denial, or procrastination will all only last so long, and they will never enable you to properly accept, release, and move forward—in fact, they will likely prevent you from obtaining peace, happiness, or success at some point over the long run. Fortunately, simply thinking about how to take care of yourself and taking small steps toward doing so tends to remedy many significant issues alone.
Sometimes you need to rewire the way your mind, heart, and body thinks in order to create a life that you genuinely enjoy living in and for. However, this is one instance in which the juice is most definitely worth the squeeze. In many cases, living life does not need to involve everyday therapy or struggling. When choosing a new path, it’s vital to pay closer attention to your feelings and emotions as opposed to your thoughts and assumptions, and it’s crucial to place more value on the same things.
Once you’ve created a life for yourself which is manageable, peaceful, and enjoyable the vast majority of the time, you will likely find that you are far more independent than you were when you first contemplated change, or when you first realized that it was pertinent.
*This content was inspired by an amazing article that can be found here.