It can be extremely difficult to outright impossible to admit it at the time, but sometimes parting ways really is for the best. Oftentimes ending a relationship is beneficial for both partners in the long run, and sometimes it’s best in both the long-term and the short-term. It’s often been said (and sung) that “nothing lasts forever,” and also that “you might find, you get what you need.” Once a relationship has ended, there is no reason to try to erase everything about it, or any of the changes that the relationship has had on you. Like most other things in life, simply—or excruciatingly—take the bad alongside the good, and learn from it in ways which will make the future better.
In the moment of a breakup (and soon after), it is far too easy to contemplate all the things which have gone wrong and all too difficult to consider any of the things which have the potential to get better. It’s always too easy to fall into the trap of thinking that all you need is love; regardless of whether or not your love is genuine, or whether or not it is returned in similar fashion. However, one thing to keep in mind is that true love will cause you to love yourself well-nigh as much as you love your partner. Once one person stops genuinely loving the other person—or if one person never really did love the other—then this severely impacts both partners and the relationship as a whole.
Yet, as mentioned, just because a relationship ends does not mean that the benefits from the relationship need to end. What’s vital is to take time alone to think about who you were at the beginning of the relationship, who you became by the end of it, and who you want to become moving forward. Just as no human being is perfect, no relationship is perfect, and no partner within a relationship is ever perfect. With this in mind, it’s possible to reflect on all the positive and negative aspects of everything, keep the good, and throw-out the bad.
Furthermore, in many cases, having at least a little time to be alone and single can result in added appreciation and desire for life. At least for the time between relationships (however long of a time period that may be), you no longer have many of the things holding you back from doing precisely what you want to do, exactly when you want to do it. This can be an odd sensation, but it’s crucial not to catch paralysis by way of analysis; prioritize your desires and ambitions, and then act to fulfill them.
Lastly, it’s always OK to remember a past loved one: the flirting, the conversations, the laughs, and the cries. It’s even OK to genuinely miss some people and some things, and it’s definitely advisable to feel grateful for all of the things you don’t have to worry about or deal with anymore as a result of departing. In life, sometimes nothing’s bigger than the little things, and sometimes the little things end up being more significant and life-changing than could have ever been imagined. Regardless of how a relationship ends, all relationships change our lives, and change us as human beings.
Oftentimes, it’s up to us to decide whether a past relationship will make us better or worse, in both the present and future.
*This content was inspired by an amazing article found here.